Sunday, August 27, 2006
The Foosball
It seems as though "the wash" is biting my style this time. As you'll notice on his write up of Mo's wedding he has several pictures posted. I can't help but notice that he does not give credit to the photographer who is responsible for these awesome shots, thus making it appear as though he is the photographer in question. Veddy interesting.
AWash has been caught in a lie. Bad boy, he should know better than to lie to me, I inevitably find out such things. Especially dangerous when the lie in question involves the claim of being out of country when one's car is parked outside less than a quarter mile from where I live. Tsk tsk tsk, Awash....will you ever learn?
My first week at Mt. Ida has been completed. Mt. Ida College is the place to be if you want to go into Funeral Services or even art, but other than that I think the current rankings made a third/fourth tier school. Its pretty small, which means parking will be an issue this week now that class is back in session, but hopefully the story that no ones pays attention to the signs designating faculty/staff parking are just a myth and I will have no issues. Also hoping no one hits my car, as I've heard of this occurrence 4 times since I started. This job won't be so bad while I look for something else, but the woman who left clearly had never trained someone, so hopefully I don't screw things up because I don't know what's going on. She was very nice and pleasant but seemed more fixated on tying up her loose ends then showing me the ropes. Close to home and getting out at 4:30 ain't so bad either. Only issue I've had thus far, is that the peeps aren't what I'd call punctual. Which is fine, they can take their time, but I don't have a key so when I show at 8:30am and have to wait for 20-30 minutes to be let in, it kinda starts the day on a sour note, cause there is only so much to look at in the hallways. And the food is bad. I never knew how spoiled I got at GW and their food court style dining options. This place is the classic, set dining hours and single cafeteria style food. I got the chicken stir fry and "rice", the chicken didn't taste like chicken and the rice was some form of cous cous. I learned to take my lunch and have found that popping the trunk of my Vue and turning on the radio of my car, along with the local paper, provides a lovely picnic type feel to my lunch hour.
Considering going into photography, got the number of a place that does youth sports, so I'll them up and see what's what. I do like taking pictures and I think I'm fairly good at it, so that could be something to investigate. Plus if it paid the bills I could look for a secondary job that is also something that I enjoy: working with animals. Got an email from Camp Canine saying that they were looking for new employees, but they pay less than i got at school so that cannot be a primary job for this gal.
More to come....
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
News Travels Fast
Had a pretty chill weekend. Friday was interview mania. Had one interview at 11:30 am, muchas gracias new temp place. It was at Mt. Ida College. I have never seen a college located in such a residential location. Of course I had never really heard of the school either so I guess that is no surprise. They liked me lots there because of my history of "working in higher education". I liked them too, until I got severely lost, so lost that I had to call upon mama to go on the trusty internet and find me a way home. Still don't know how i got lost or where I was, but I did manage to make it home. Second interview was at a local wholesale club's corportate office. I was a lil taken aback by the amount of security they had on display. I had never realized that this field of work would require identification entry into every single door (perhaps even the bathroom). I could tell this job wasn't for me, when I was distracted by my first interviewer's prominent front teeth and by my third interviewer's bulbous eyes. These kinds of distractions never bode well for me. One good thing I did get to take from the experience was the comment that I interview well. This is not something I had thought of my self before, because I tend to think I get nervous under pressure. Don't get me wrong, I perform extremely well under pressure, but usually I feel my voice does this wacky quavering thing whenever my mind is working quickly. They were also slightly shady about the $$ involved. This was a temp-perm job offer and I asked about salary because they initiated a talk on benefits. i couldn't get a straight answer, just that it would not be less then I made as a temp. I should hope not! How embarassing would that be? Plus, I am fully aware that the agency makes between $5-7 off me per hour, so I would think that I would be recouping that as a full time employee, no? Needless to say I have chosen the educational job, which means I might be selling out and becoming that person that calls alumni for money. Luckily Mt. Ida isn't an expensive school so I don't plan on encountering the vehement anger that I feel towards folks from GW who felt that even while I was attending grad school there, since I was technically an alum I should be hit up for some cash. Like my $38,0000 a year for 4 years shouldn't buy me some time? Gimme a break
Saturday brought about the second to last bridal event for me. My future sister in law had her shower. It was very lovely. I'm not so much into Greek food but it was nice to catch up with my old friend Emily who has moved to NY to pursue her career in "making young girls feel badly about their bodies" aka fashion. I also felt like maybe i missed a color memo. A significant proportion of attendees seemed to be donning the pink. Not that it would've mattered much, since I don't think I own clothing in that color family. Lots of nice presents to ooh and ahh over. And later that night was the bachelorette party. A first for me as I had to miss my current sister in law's due to an airplane mishap (damn Philly for losing my luggage!!!!). It was pretty good. Most importantly my future sis in law had a great time and that's all that really matters. The limo driver was funny and cool and didn't get lost at all, which is always a good thing.
The bridesmaids made a mostly collective agreement that gold shoes should be worn for the wedding (Rolos it is Kellay), so Sunday I went to see if I could find a new pair of shoes. I had bought a pair to dye, but since I don't really wear gold I'll probably just dye to match for future use. As previously mentioned the dress is dope and will be worn again. I brought the shoes i wore to wash's wedding to see if I could dye those gold and then dye them black after. They are wicked comfortable and I've been meaning to get them dyed black for awhile. Lo and behold the master colorist was on vacation and they would not guarantee me that my shoes would be an acceptable shade of gold. Scratch idea #1, found the pair of shoes that had been runner up in my dye to match campaign, but alas they lacked my size. So in order for the store to have a perfectly legit size, I would have to pay up front. Homey don't play that! There is no way I'm paying for a pair of shoes that I don't even know will fit. What kind of scam is that? its not like i was asking for size 12, clearly 9.5 is a popular size as it has already been sold out. Uggggh, so scratch idea #2. I found a pair of gold shoes that i found acceptable for a reasonable price. So all I have to do is practice walking in them twice a week until the wedding (t minus 2 months) to make sure that I am comfortable, though methinks I shall bring a pair of flops or more comfortable shoes to change into at the reception. Maybe my practice walking can figure into my starvation diet that I am undergoing so that I can attempt to fit into my sister-in law's dress and she can have my larger size to accommodate my growing niece or nephew.
Had another attack of the idiot cart people in the Target parking lot. Maybe they have their group meetings there or something, because I get hit by dumbass rude cart people more frequently there than in any other lot. How hard is it to push the cart in the cart corral? Especially when it is a matter of feet from you? I have found that more often people in this lot go out of their way to be rude and put it next to, in front of, or behind other cars.
One last sidenote: Prison Break is back on the air!!!! WHOOP WHOOP, I love that show
The title? I get an email today from my good friend Ricky Ticky Ticky saying that he heard from Oshea that I'm coming back to the Capital. I am? I'm certainly considering it and depending on how an upcoming interview goes I may have to make that decision, but have I hired a moving truck or looked for an apartment yet? Nope, though I do have a lovely housing offer by the JKs in bawldimore, 4 weeks with no baking, 6 if I agree to bake. But what I'm trying to say is that I still do not have plans to move and I don't know where these rumors got started. Nice to know people still talk about me though. Something oddly comforting about it.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Let the Sunshine In
On to some better stuff. JK has taken the best blog title I've seen in awhile. Hmmm, i seem to be experiencing some picture uploading difficulties so I shall do my best with words. It was an awesome weekend for a wedding. Truly only the 3rd or 4th good one of the whole summer. You could not have asked for better. I played my part of yarmulke distribution aide very well. I've never been to a ceremony with both a Rabbi and a Priest and I had some concern on the length of the ceremony. No worries were necessary. Even with three readings and explanation of both traditions as they occurred, the ceremony was not long, was audible and was very sweet. Jen looked beautiful in her dress and Adam and the boys were very chill in their sweet suits. Reasons for wedding rocking:
1)I love Dirty Nat weddings because I get to hang with Wash's friends which are like family to me. I always love to hang with JK and Angie as well as Adam and Jen and even Skiparoo made an appearance. Seriously fun folk = serious fun time
2)Open bar for a significant portion of the night....need I say more? The barkeep was also on his game and only required one or two requests before he remembered my drink of choice and them waiting for me.
3) Let's do the HORA!!! I had some doubts that this dance would occur, and it is always fun and always a workout because you're basically just dancing/running in a circle for the entire length of the song which is pretty freakin long. Sadly, the greatest fear aboutt this dance came to pass, and the groom fell off the chair. Luckily, he has maintained some of his bball grace and was able to "glide" off the chair onto his feet. I say this was bound to happen as only Gentiles were handling the chair lifting duties, and really how many times have any of them done this before? After this slippage, the brides knuckles definitely took on a death vice like grip on her own chair to prevent a repeat performance.
4)Good eats!
5)Never a dull moment: I heard a teeny tiny rumor that the groom chose to use the ladies room and avoid the one men's room line of the evening. But he's the groom so he can pretty much do as he pleases.
6)Had an overnight camp like feeling in the good ole hotel room. Due to my aforementioned unemployment I intended to share a room with the parentals. My sis in law wasn't feeling so good so she didn't make the trip. Add one wash to the room. "Plan B" aka Skiparoo showed up to the wedding without arrangements. Wash being the stand up guy he is offered Skip a place on our floor. I woke up to see Skip streched along the foot of my bed and a big pile of blankets which I must presume was my brother.
7)Got some QT time with the bro, again my uploading woes will prevent this from doing justice, but dude is crazy. He's one of those people that just finds the good time in everything. Took an old helmet of elder wash's and had a serious Village People vibe going on. Then we did some landscaping in the front. When I can I shall post a picture of the refuse from this endeavor.
Overall I give this weekend a resounding two thumbs up, cause you can't go wrong with happy event, good peeps, good food, and good drink. Congratulations to the latest bride and groom. And a final warning to all you rude folk, the dog has been let out of the bag, so you best watch yourself.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Are butts the new boobs?
Went to the post office yesterday to send a gift to Blair to celebrate her 24th birthday. As per usual, their was a hefty line and only 2 postal workers. A woman came up behind me and continued to sigh heavily for the entire time i was there. Now, waiting in line is annoying enough...I get it, people don't like to wait whatever but seriously? I mean seriously, why the hell would make the whole thing even more irritating but sighing and as a result blowing your stinky ass breath onto the person in front of you? Come on now! The only thing I can think of is that she was trying to sigh me right out of line. Foolish woman! I'm the youngest with two older brothers, lived with three girls and one bathroom in college, and taught 75 underclassmen in a statistics lab, my tolerance for annoyance is quite high! Plus, I'd be more inclined to bap her in the nose (a la the dog whisperer) than get out of line.
Also reading a new book. SDACP was a good read, and I'd recommened to my Cali bro and sis in law, but i think it takes a certain kind of person to appreciate it. The more cerebrally based people should probably steer clear, but those with an artsy bent and can appreciate pop culture will find it fun to read. my new book is the Color of Water. I'm about half way through, which is great cause i gotta bring it back by the end of the week. Its a non fiction book with the subtitle: "A Black Man's tribute to his White mother". This is more deep than the first book but so fascinating to read. The mom is white, was raised as an Orthodox Jew by her Rabbi father in the 30'sish. She gets involved with a local Black boy, pregnant, flees home and converts to Christianity and goes on to have 13 more kids. It's definitely the most interesting real story I've read in a long time. (fyi, the title refers to how she tries to impart on her kids that color is not an issue and that God is the color of water not White or Black)
Speaking of Jews, Mel Gibson needs to go back to Austrailia and live on a farm if he can't keep his bigoted mouth shut. Yeah he was drunk, but give me a break. I've never known a drunk to let loose a diatribe that they didn't mean. usually alochol makes people feel more free to say what it is they want because they lack inhibition. So I say Mel take your crappy ass movies (when was the last good Mel Gibson movie anyway?) and return to the Outback.
Monday, July 24, 2006
508 vs 202 Round 1
Boston:
Pro-parentals are here, Samson is here and might not last long if I leave, I like the weather, technically I guess you can throw in my brother, though truthfully I see him as much here as I did when I lived in DC so he kinda cancels himself out, no sales tax on necessities, free rent for the time being
Cons-the "friends" i thought I had up here seemed to have disappeared (perhaps into a fair weather friend netherland), my field is not predominant up here, public transportation leaves something to be desired, starting to feel like a moocher
DC:
Pros- Field is up and coming and DC is where its at, plenty of people at GW that would be willing to give me a job while I continued the search, the friends I left in DC are for the most part still there (and still talk to me), Kellay is down there (at least for the time being), Jon/Angie are in bmore, Metro system rocks, three airports to choose from, NO Big Dig to worry about, GW work contacts are in the area, tons of cultural and educational things to do (i.e no boredom possible)
Cons- No blood family down there, high cost of living, no puppy, no sports teams worth caring about (ravens pssh, they aren't really from bmore, nationals blech no history, redskins? puh lease give me a break), requires the purchase of a plane ticket for October festivities (though i suppose i could make the drive), summer weather blows big chunks
Did I forget anything?
As you wish
I was gonna write about grudges and apologies and other assorted annoying things but I think it all comes back to Karma, which i've written about previously and this blog isn't old enough for me to be repeating myself so soon. Here's the gist: if someone does you wrong its not a grudge to remember it if said person doesn't apologize for their behavior. However, if you keep being mad after an apology has been issued then you are holding a grudge and tempting fate. And let's be real...you don't want to be tempting the wheel of fate. I remember writing something about the wheel of fate in high school and how it was bad mojo to try its patience. Two quick examples, one tragic and one kinda eerie. First for the tragic one: now let's discuss the horrific tragedy of the multiple ton piece of ceiling concrete tile falling and killing a passenger in a car on the Pike tunnel. As AWash pointed out, this woman must have had some kind of bad mojo to have the ceiling tile fall directly on her, her fellow passenger escaping with minor cuts. That tile fell squarely on her section of the car, kinda freaky no? Second example? Massachusetts has been having some bad (torrential rain) weather all summer. I couldn't help but notice a news story the other day about a freak lightning storm in Worcester. This resulted in a direct strike on a church....ON A CHURCH. I mean talk about your bad karma when you get struck down with lightning in a place of worship.
No real weekend roundup to speak of. First the weather blew, then I am beginning to suffer from my unemployment meaning even less to do. I'm currently debating going back to being blonde but i may need to wait for employment so that I could maintain it. My temp agency seems to excel in leading me astray. First they had an assignment for me, then nothing then another one that I was supposed to start this week, but since the corporate office is in CA, nothing has been confirmed. Add to that the fact that my recruiter has once again been led astray in what the company actually does and you can see why I anxiously await full time employ with someone. SUpposedly this next assignment would involve dealing with expert witnesses. This would be cool and relatively close in scope to what I studied, or at the very least something I studied. Alas, a quick examination at the website and you would learn this company is all about helping companies find solutions to their technical woes. I guess we'll see. I did get an email from the Urban Institute in DC about my application. They picked someone else, but I thought it was classy that they let me know...they are one of the few who have shown that courtesy.
No more rhyming and I mean it
Anybody want a peanut?
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
My Bad
Second, the whole reason I titled my post "Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs" yesterday was because I intended to inform the public as to my latest reading endeavor but then i got so caught up recounting vomit boy that I forgot my purpose. Anywho, if you find yourself with some free time and you're looking for a book to occupy it, I highly suggest Chuck Klosterman's book with the aforementioned title. I'm about half way through it and find it highly enjoyable. Quite possibly the only book in existence that purports to discuss the social importance of such varied topics as Soccer (the one chapter my bro and sis-in-law should skip over), The Sims, Rock Stars, and Saved By the Bell. An early chapter refers to the Mick Jagger effect which I found utterly fascinating. I don't want to ruin this book, because i'm feeling that it should be read by all, but consider this. Mick Jagger is, one could argue, a sexual rock god. I don't see it myself but whatever, there are sufficient offspring to support this notion. But does he have this effect because of his looks? For example, would women still swoon and send panties if his profession was....let's say a pizza delivery man? methinks not. In fact, most rock stars have a following because of their profession. Picture any of them in a "normal" job and they lose their appeal, cause let's face it....they ain't usually pretty. BUT, they do have this charisma that draws people to them on stage and that is what is called the Mick Jagger effect.
Shoot, you know what? I think i'm confusing too books. Klosterman's is great and just wrote about how you can compare all divisions in the country (be them religious, racial, or anything else) to whether you were a fan of the Lakers or Celtics during the eighties. That Mick Jagger effect was something I read in a Chick Lit book right before I began my exploration into Pop Culture Philosophy.
Today is Wednesday, meaning its time to hit up the Washington Post's Help Wanted Section. T-Dawg Out!
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs
Weekend roundup (don't read while eating):
Friday: I get a call from mama saying that she is planning on leaving work at 1 and I could meet up with her if I so desired at the mall. I agreed to meet her after errands and then received a call from Mama Karp inviting me to her pool since it was so ghastly out. As I have mentioned before, the Karps are like family to me, so I find it as normal to hang with Mrs. Karp as I do with my own mom. Apparently people outside the circle don't see it that way. Upon my arrival the other guests seem to find it odd that i have come sans parentals. WHatever, haters will always find something to hate on I guess. Anywho, after meeting up with mom and hitting the mall we go to eat at Ruby Tuesdays. NOw this isn't the best or fanciest establishment but it is the one place where Papa W actually eats salad!!! So we go there somewhat frequently to encourage this eating habit. Sadly our meal was interupted by a fellow patron who took ill and couldn't manage to make it to the restroom prior to displaying his meal on the floor for all to see. GROSS. Worse? Our table that evening happened to be located right by the bathroom so we got the full view. Even worse? I kept this opinion to myself, but my brief glimpse of the regurgitated meal had an eerie resemblance to my dad's plate when he comes back from the salad bar.
Saturday: ANother ghastly day, another invite to the pool. My parents went to go hang on a boat, but I don't do so good on boats normally and this one wasn't leaving the harbor so I vetoed that idea. This time, lil Jared was there. I like lil Jared, but he's always been real quiet around me. I've never been offended by this, but did have the feeling he didn't dig Jude's Auntie. That changed on Sat when he warmed up to his new pool buddy. We played an odd game with his rules that he somehow kept losing. Then he discovered how fun it is to use people as a jungle gym in the pool. Good times, like hanging with the little folk, but it does make me miss my nephew, esp since I usually only get to see him in the winter.
Sunday: Went to go get my new bag. I don't usually dig shopping or purses or shoes. But I fell for a new Kenneth Cole bag. First time in my life I can recall having this reaction to a material object that wasn't electronic or a sneaker. I even walked around the store with it, because I didn't have the available cash to be tossing out for a bag when I have a perfectly functioning one. My parents were so shocked by my reaction that they actually fronted the cash for me to go purchase it. Thanks Daddy!!! Went back to the pool and enjoyed some QT time with the folks. I may have also picked up a wedding present for an upcoming event.
Been keeping busy by applying to jobs. Mondays and Tuesdays I focus on staying in state, while Wednesdays and Thursdays I spend looking back in the District. Made a new high total for resumes sent out of 12 last week. I usually aim for 5-7/week but i was inspired by my former student's employment with a company I was interested in, and subsequently applied to every RA position they had available....including one in Palo Alto, CA.
That's it for now, more errands and vet appts to keep today. And an attempt not to melt into the pavement. Yesterday I felt like I was burning in the short span between car and store. Can't imagine what today will feel like, but it seems that they old shorts will be busted out for a limited time appearance.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
shipoopi
Of course I knew this was too good to be true. I returned home during a lull in the storm and tried to take sammy out so he could provide his own watering services. Not five steps from the door did I hear "WHOOSH" and cue downpour once again. I had a rain coat and umbrella but sammy didn't fare so well. Hasn't been that wet since his last bath, but he does enjoy the drying off game so it wasn't so bad. Later in the day I received some irritating news. I perused my facebook account. What's facebook? If you don't know, you haven't been in the education realm the last three years and don't need to know. I looked at one of my former student's profiles cause it was updated (she's one of my facebook friends) and noticed that she is working at a company that I applied to and never heard back from. Say wha?!?!?! This is a research company, I taught her research methods. Ergo, I gave her the tools to secure the job and I can't have one too? Incensed, I applied to all research assistant positions available because if they hired her, they should hire me too. Now that i think about it, I may have accidentally applied to a job in Palo Alto, CA....cross that bridge later.
Last thing to note. I had a successful manual labor experience. I bought a three shelf unit with a door from Bed, Bath, and Beyond. i've built several of this furniture type and each and everytime I have managed to put one piece on backward so that the grainy wood side is exposed. You could almost call it my trademark. Anywho, busted out the trusty tool bag that is filled with all kinds of tool goodness and proceeded to put together the entire unit with samson's guidance. Even better? It was done correctly!!!!! I think I may be redeeming myself in this realm.
And for my brother. JW, when it is said that three words in the english language and three alone that begin with dw, you cannot name two derivatives of the same word. Tsk tsk tsk, i expected more out of a lawyer.
Monday, July 10, 2006
Things that make you go hmmmmm.
1)Karma really exists: I do enjoy Jason Lee in My Name is Earl and I thought the premise was amusing...trying to right karma. But when you think about it, Karma does seem to exist. You can call it "what goes around comes around" or "you reap what you sew" but no matter what you call it something seems to cosmically keep the balance of the world in check. Here are two examples. One, (and I gotta right about the Samson) the pooch has this annoying habit lately of pretending to be unable to get out of the car so that he can get an extended ride. Friday, I took him with me to measure my current walking route and got home and he pulled his schtick again. Only this time his obstinance backfired. He lay down in a way that had his weight shifted towards the front of the car. In my mind, i knew it was only a matter of time before he fell, but what could I do? Sure enough Karma kicked his arse and he became wedged between the front and back seats. Again, what could I do? The best solution I could come up with was to shove my seat all the way forward to give him enough room to try to flip over and out of the car. Luckily he is more agile than a turtle flipped on its back and made it out okay.
2) i was explaining to mom about my pet peeves involving shopping carts and the inability to use the cart corral. Mostly cause we were at Target and that parking lot is the most frequent offender. Sure enough when we exited the Christmas Tree Shop there was a shopping cart parked directly behind my craptastic car. Say wha!!!! Now, why is this is ironic or karmic or any of that jazz? Because I parked, quite possibly the furthest I could from any visible car. There was no one around me and I still got carted!
3) The reason that I prefer Tarjay: I went to Walmart to burn a cd of my Karp Wedding pics and pick up a new album. I take lots of pics and I am now on my 14th or 15th 300 picture album. I had forgotten that Tarjay had a picture area so i went to walmart. There were three people in front of me at the picture kiosk. no worries, I went to go find my album and got the last one there was! Sweet I thought. But i got back to line and the two elder women were having some issues. Issues that involved breaking the damn machine, meaning it had to get rebooted and then they had to start over. Eventually they figured it out. Then the guy in front of me went (he'd been waiting an hour) and his camera card wasn't working. Cue rolling eyes. Luckily he had a cd to work with too. Then he, cause he was wicked nice, asked if i was just making a cd, when this was confirmed he let me cut in front of him while he tried to coax his card into working. Finished the cd. Had to flag down someone for envelope for the cd. Got into line at the front of the store. uh oh! Apparently Wal-Mart has some issues with price stickers....like they can't ring up bar codes if the sticker isn't on the product. So Mr. "Something isn't quite right" cashier went to the floor register manager who came up with the notion that it was my responbility to get the price sticker. Customer service? what customer service? The cashier said he could ring up my album and I increduously asked why they couldn't find out the price. No answer. At this point, I'm realizing I could have easily walked out with the cd with no problem but that damn honesty thing I got going always ruins me. As I grab my stuff out of his arms to go back to the film center and I mutter something about, "this being the reason people go to Target instead"
4) The newly discovered scam: Bridal stores. Anyone ever notice that bridal stores have some kind of bizzaro measurement method to their dresses? And that they are always constructed in a way that means you have to go two sizes up because you can never let them out? For my brother's upcoming wedding I will be wearing a beautiful brown dress and I loved it on the hanger. that is until I had to go to this boutique to get measured and had one of the worst experiences with clothing in my life. Now I would define myself as pleasantly plump and certainly won't be winning any beauty pageants but this woman made me feel like I was some hideous monster and resulted in my fleeing the premises crying. My second visit was slightly better but needless to say this place has scarred me. flash forward three months and I go to pick up my sister in law's dress for the wedding. They made her get a dress that was at least 3 sizes larger than she typically wears! I was shocked! Course, it also made me feel slightly better about my experience cause at least it wasn't just me. Course, it also works out well cause now she has room for the new bambino to grow and still fit in the dress. But my point is this...these boutiques scam you into thinking you need a larger size and then conveniently have a connection with a seamstress who'll fix the dress (and probably donate a cut back to the boutique). But like I said, it is a beautiful dress and I look forward to wearing it, even if it means I must succomb to this scam.
5) I end this posting with two quiz questions and an opinion question. First, what is the only fruit that has all of its seeds on the outside? Second, there are three words and three words only in the English language that begin with the letters 'dw', name them. If you think someone has a problem with you, what do you do? Do you wait it out and hope it goes away, risking the issue festering into something bigger, or do you confront the situation immediately risking making life awkward?
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Clowns to the left, jokers to the right
1) I must concur with Wash that the open bar was a stroke of genius. Contrary to Mr. Karp the elder's belief, I do in fact enjoy beverages from time to time. As I had my ID on me, there was no fear of rejection from the barkeeps. Lovely wine and alcohol selections though I have discovered that gin and tonic is not my drink.
2)Beautiful location/weather. After living through a variety of monsoons the last few weeks and getting negative weather reports from Kellay in Towson, I was fearful for what we would face. However, I was able to straighten my hair and keep it straight! Meaning? no humidity, comfortable temperature and slight breeze to keep all comfortable during the short ceremony.
3)When I was applying to colleges there was this part where you had to submit an essay. Since I applied to GW, they had cheesey topics about what monument you would build or which president you'd want to meet, blah blah blah, or you could send an original essay as part of a general app. I chose to write mine on FAMILY and what it means to me. This wedding reaffirmed it because I don't think blood determines family. I have plenty of blood relatives that couldn't pick me out of a line up let alone know my birthday, my age or what i'm doing with my life. However, I think of the Karps and Movitzs as being my family. They are the ones I see at holidays, they are the ones that can recall what they were doing when I was born. They are the ones that have come to graduations, athletic events and life events. They even know how old I am (good call Mo). So my point is that this wedding was special because it gave me more time to spend with my family, which doesn't happen as much anymore.
Lowlights?
1)that bus driver. Damn was she a piece of work. She didn't really know where she was going and I feared for my life when i saw her mapquest directions fly off the console. My nephew was very disturbed at the lack of seatbelts. All this and she was a bit rude when people requested some desperately needed AC.
2)the "limo" to and from the airport. FIrst the guy gets lost picking up the last person, by the time we get to this house the person cancels (literally as we pull in the driveway). We leave about 20-25 minutes later than intended. Coming back? We had to call for a pick up after being delayed. This involved an additional 20-25 minute wait further compounded by a required stop to transfer someone off the van. Lastly, the van driver seemed to think that we were leading him down a dead end and wasn't interested in listening to directions.
As you can see the lowlights really had nothing to do with the wedding itself which is why I consider it tops.
It ain't easy being me. There are three kids in the fambino which is an awkward number. Can't really pair off cause someone gets left out. Since I'm the only girl, I tend to be the one on the outside. Both of them have found wives which would seem to even the odds in my favor. But they also seem to get along better with each other than with me. Not a huge deal, but needless to say that three is not my favorite number. Sometimes the only way to remain relevant is to be peacekeeper so that is my place in the family. And this conludes my Debbie Downer segment
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
May I introduce Mr. and Mrs. Karp

So first off, a Happy 4th of July to all. This is the first year I won't be seeing fireworks which makes me sad, but the expansion of the local mall has removed the only feasible location for Dirty Nat fireworks and as I live here and not the District anymore, that means no public displays of fireyworks for this girl. Sad. Secondly, let's all have a "Hallelujah" moment to celebrate Sammy's rescue from Fat Camp. This time he was given a cheeseburger in order to encourage him to take his pills, haven't checked over the bill myself, but I hope this cheeseburger isn't like one of those $500 government toilet seat covers. Also, I am happy to report that his vet agrees with my assessment that his stomach infection has finally cleared up. While most of you don't care, I'd like to point out that this problem develped in November at Thanksgiving and it is the 4th of JULY. That's one heck of an infection.
Now onto a weekend recap which will actually have exciting things.
Friday: Dropped samson off at the vet and completely overpacked for a weekend trip down to bmore to see my good friend angie and jon get married. The funny thing about this wedding, is I've actually known Angie for longer than anyone else involved with any of my "brothers". She came with Jon for my high school graduation party and I knew then that she was a fabulous lady. Flew down with the parentals, brother and fiancee. Ate dinner in the hotel and proceeded to earn the ire of the housekeeping staff by rearranging the lobby to accomodate the Karp guests that trickled in as the night went on and the drinks came out of the bar.
Saturday: Woke up wicked early, ate some brunch and put on the swimsuit. Kellay came down from Towson and hung at the pool where I proved that I am in fact a natural dark beauty with occasional red streaky zones. Very chill day. Then it came time to g
et ready to boogie. Got all gussied up and went downstairs and left for the wedding. I must agree with JK that Angie looked absolutely beautiful in both of her dresses. And while I couldn't hear the officiant, it felt like a beautiful ceremony. Sat at my table with alex, stacey, jude, jamaican peter and three Karp cousins. One of whom apparently did not feel comfortable there and despite my attempts at small talk abruptly left the table to sit with his mom. Lots of pictures were tken because I don't usually get to see all of these people more than two-three days a year at thanksgiving. I've realized that I am sick of being the one to take the pictures cause then I'm never in any which is a bummer. Apparently the point and shoot camera I have is beyond comprehension. I tried to get in a pic with Wash but my dad couldn't see the buttons so I asked Skip. Skip who scored over 1500 on the SAT and is pretty darned smart tried and tried but could not take a picture and tried to say the camera was broken. Above is the picture taken when Wash proved that it was fully functional. Then during the group father-daughter dance, family friend was kind enough to pics of my brothers and mom as well as Adam and his mom which came out nice, but his attempt to capture me and Dr. Mikey ended up with a prominent view of his thumb instead of us. After the wedding, I provided an assist to get my nephew up to bed and received a call to go the bar to join my parents and their friends. I obliged and joined for a drink. Then the new Mr. and Mrs. Karp arrived and I had to stay for some more drinks. We closed the bar, it seems the party was to continue in the best man's room but i chose to retire. As I got off at my floor and bid the party people adieu I was given some of the loudest booing I have ever heard. Very flattering that these people wanted some more of my time. My parents actually asked what that loud noise was when i came in the room (they had obviously stayed awake for my arrival). I give this wedding a full four star rating.
Sunday: Received the news that my eldest brother sold me out and chose not to call me up to a room while my sister in law took an important test. Am I peeved? You betcha. At brunch I found out that the speculation had been right and that I'm gonna be an auntie again!!!! Congrats to Wash and Yan Yan.
That's it for now, gotta organize the pics while i come up with more highlights.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Incredi-who?
******Warning:
the following should not be read while consuming food (got it Kellay?)****So this am, papa w was returning from the west coast on a red eye. Sammy LOVES car rides and he's old and arthritic now so he's not really allowed to go so often which makes him depressed. Since he's going to fat camp for a few days I took pity on him. Plus how could I possibly reject this face.... Anywho, so big papa calls to announce that he is awaiting pick up at the bus station. I tell sammy he has to go to the potty if he wants to get in the car which immediately gets him revved. Then momma comes out and swears he's done his business for the day. So i let him in. BIG mistake #3. Sure enough he managed to leave a lil something something in my car again when we got home. I can't blame him because when I came in the house to retrieve my handy dandy rubber gloves again my mom then tells me that maybe she pulled him inside before he was done. Really? Ya think?? Perhaps the fact that he pulled me straight to the backyard after exiting the car to finish off his business might have been the first hint to me. Alas, the sheet is being washed because I have to put him in tomorrow to take him to fat camp. On the positive side, I do believe that his vet induced skin infection has finally cleared....eight months later.
Monday, June 26, 2006
April showers bring more showers?
All I have to say is what the f? I'm so tired of rain, not only for the dampering of the spirits and the inability to enjoy the outdoors but also cause it makes the ole knee swell up making clothing myself a difficult prospect. One can only wear sweats for so many days before people start thinking, "My she's really let herself go hasn't she? What a shame". Skirts are an option but I prefer covered legs during rain. Who knows why, its a personal preference. Checked on a job status that biggest bro is helping me with and I have tentatively passed the initial qualification! Course, I'm pretty sure that just means I filled out the app correctly online, but hey its something.
Now for a weekend recap. Nothing too exciting I must admit because financials are still not in a happy place. Friday rented some movies. Saturday, went to the mall with my mom again. We are a renowned tag team. People actually ask where the other is if we're not together.....that is a tad on the sad side but I digress. The Asian Hair Cart ladies were excited to see us again because we pretty much keep them in business, but their stuff is so good how could we refuse? Saturday night went to Wildwood with the folks and the Karps. Never been there before, despite what my family says I was left out of the engagement celebratory dinner. Quite tasty steak and conversation. However, I was unable to get a drink because i left my ID at home. Waitress with oddly pitches sing song voice rejected me despite the fact that my parents were there because I didn't have a pesky card. BUMMER.
Sunday? Well Sunday brought about the start of Wedding Bonanza which meant it was my second official bridal shower, well third if you count one from college. But that one was actually held in the study room of a dorm so I don't. The picture to the left? Was it some wacky shower game to torture the future hubby? Stay tuned. I was immediately caught off guard when leaving my house because my mom got in the passenger side of her own car. Wha? Apparently I was voted to drive to Saugus. Made it there with mom and mama Karp in time for the shower. It was pretty cool. No cheesey shower games which was A-OK by me. Did feel a little badly for Mo though cause he was the only dude there. But he's a cool dude so he can hang. Course he was put to work...hence the picture to the left. That apartment got pretty toasty with the oven, the humidity and the rain preventing window openage. Former bball player Mo, got to rediscover his skill by balancing on a chair on an ottoman to turn on the fan. Lots of work, but definitely made a difference. The only weird thing about the shower is that I swear I could smell a certain wacky tobaccy odor seeping in from somewhere during the gift opening.To finish up the night I gave Sammy his three pill nightly cocktail which he took with no problem so I felt co
mpelled to give him his cheese. Having completed my duties, I set up getting ready for bed. I hadn't even gotten to floss my teeth before I hear an awful sound...the sound of retching. Sure enough I exist the bathroom and there is Sammy looking guilty and dangerously close to the couch and sure enough when I round the chair I see a lovely pile of vomit highlighted by undigested cheese. Oh trusty rubber gloves!!! Cleaned up the mess and went to bed. Took sammy with me to drop off the movie today and don't get fair before he gets an odd look of ecstasy on his face. Definitely means trouble. Just a matter of seconds before the odor-rific scent of doody fills the car. Too far to make it worthwhile to turn around but by the time I get back, he has also sat in it. Luckily he didn't play like he wouldn't get out of the car. Had to wipe him off and then fix the car with a lovely combo of rubber gloves, febreeze, resolve, and windex. Why windex? Oh somehow he managed to get it on the door too. Sometimes I really do feel like a glorified pooper scooper.T-minus 4 days til boozin in the hotel time. Bought my gift today so hopefully it'll arrive before the big day.
Friday, June 23, 2006
News from the underground
As I am still unemployed (new application sent in and prospects on the horizon), I have fair amounts of free time. So I meandered to the ole town mall where all the happening shopping occurs. Truthfully, it is pretty nice and with the new addition that they are building it'll be even better. Not sure what i was looking for...perhaps a father's day gift or one of many wedding/shower presents that are just waiting to be selected for a variety of big days. Naturally, I am drawn to stores that I like to shop in like Vicky S. Why do I like it so much? I have a sort of male mentality when it comes to laundry so I like to stock up on the essentials to push back the length of time I can take between laundry days. Kinda gross, but it is what it is. Anywho, as I peruse the store and make my way out I notice these two huge women. Like 6'5" which is incredibly tall. I've been around tall ladies before and they don't freak me out at all, but there was something about these two that just didn't fly. As I walk by them I hear them speak and I immediately know why my alarm bell went off. Ladies are dudes in drag!!! Now I lived in DC for 6 years so I got nothing against Drag Queens and have watched "Drag Races" in Dupont. It's cool, got no problems with their lifestyle. That being said...I didn't know they existed my lil suburban town and it was a lil weird to see them in a woman's underthings store.
If you'll recall from the Girlie Girl entry, me and power tools may not go together like rama lama dingy dong. I try I really do. The lawn needs a mowin and I'm available. So I put on my shorts, roll my sleeves ghetto style, get the glasses and the poo shoes. Poo shoes? Well if you have a dog you know about the need for non-textured soles in the event of an accidental step. Push the mower out of the garage, prime it, rip the cord a few times and off I go. The anal personality in me usually quarters the yard off and completing a section before moving on. Yesterday, I tried to just do a simple circle of the whole yard. I get around 2.5 times and then....mower dies. Try to start again. No go. Check the gas...still visible amounts and the gas can is empty so there's nothing i can do there. Prime again, won't start. Damn, the twisting motion of starting the mower is not doing wonders for the knee. I was foiled by lawn equipment again. Worse, you can barely tell i did anything because of my circling method.
Getting psyched for the trip to bmore. Pseudo brother is getting married to a very fun lady. Should be good times, good drink, and good food. And I'll finally leave the rain infested noreast.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
The Interview
Now for the interview. This is only the second interview I've actually engaged in since I got my college job. I went to a religiously affiliated non-profit organization. This job was totally not my gig but i figured I needed to expand my horizons and try new things anyway. There is a new organization to support cultural arts and they were looking for an office assistant. The initial woman was nice enough and asked all about me. She had a kid at GW, so right off the bat I knew she had a certain picture of my financial situation in mind. Let's be real, GW students are a world onto themselves. You probably have more kids from Long Island with extremely wealthy parents and the children of diplomats than at any other university. Accordingly, the image of the GW student as a whole is one of extreme wealth. Sorry folks, I don't fit the bill, i went there on a scholarship not cause mommy and daddy own some company or have a building named after them on campus. Anywho, after a spiel on the organization and the direction, the woman informed me that the greatest focus would be on seeking donations. Then the question....."what do your parents do"? Say what!? What exactly does my parents' employment have to do with my job potential? If my mom was a law firm partner instead of a paralegal does that mean i get the job? Hmmmmmm, sounded quite shady to me and made my desire for the job to take a stiff dive to the hell no range. Then I go out and meet two other women from the job to ask further questions. guess its a tight knit place so its key that everyone gets along. Talk some more about myself...truthfully just repeat what I'd already said. then I get asked about my religion. Again I say , "errr?" Now keep in mind I was wearing a religious relic around my neck that clearly defined what religion I observe. I kept my nasty comment in and answered. I left well aware that I didn't want the job even if I got an offer. Next day i talked to my agency and told them what happened. They were in shock. Such shock they called me back after the initial call to apologize. Course, i told them not to worry. Frankly, I think there are other things they could be apologizing for, not the questions of an interview that they weren't involved in. Sheesh.
Sunday marks the beginning of Wedding bonanza 2006, too bad its gonna start off with a rain storm. Lucky it's a bridal shower and not a wedding so the fact that nature is providing a shower during the shower seems somewhat appropriate.
Monday, June 19, 2006
Life, or something like it....
New Profession ideas from the parental front. Seems our kitchen sink, unbeknownst to us, had quite the leak going on. This vital bit of information was discovered last night. The plumber came in and we found that nowadays plumbers charge their time, from the moment they are dispatched to the moment they are done as well as a parts charge and a labor wage. Quite the payroll. Mom suggested I look into that. But methinks i've proved that I should not use tools in a regular fashion. Shoot, if it plugs in, I need a warranty. How many people can say that they have actually cashed in on a warranty for a cordless phone? Ding Ding Ding, that's right party people yours truly has actually purchased a warranty for a cordless phone and had to use it. Plus Grampa was a plumber and if he wants one thing its that no family members do better than he was able to do. The other employment brainstorm of the day is that I should get into physical therapy. Two knee surgeries prior to the age of 24 and about 18 months of physical therapy did spark an interest for me but i just never thought of getting an education in it. If this current tract doesn't work out for me I may just look into getting a degree for PT, cause that'd be nifty and helpful. Btw, I do have an interview today, but my agency didn't provide me with much info so i'll have to wing it.
Friday, June 16, 2006
Girlie Girl?

First, i wanted to post a picture of the original furry ninja for your viewing pleasure.
Well, like i've mentioned I'm the youngest of three, both older siblings are guys. Wash's two bf's are like brothers to me and a lot of my friends growing up were of the male persuasion. Because of this, I tend to not consider myself very girlie. Especially growing up, I would've classified myself as a tomboy. You can ask my mom cause she was none too pleased about it. I mean obviously they wanted a girl or they wouldn't have stopped having kids until they got me :) but i wasn't exactly the girl that my mom had hoped for. She forced me to take dance classes. I hated them, I would've rathered been enrolled in a sport. Hated shopping until I was in college. Didn't touch makeup til highschool.... you get the point. Big sports fanatic. know a lot about them and enjoy playing them. Even played some flag football in college/grad school until my team was finally able to win the Co-Rec Championship and I got the tshirt I'd so desired.
However, sometimes i find myself being a girlie girl and I don't know where its coming from. I like shopping (well for the most part) and I am unwilling to camp cause i can't handle bugs. though if asked, I may just respond that due to my surgical knee repair I prefer to lay upon cushioned surfaces so as to not reaggravate the problem and require a third surgery before i even turn 30. Alas, I tried to be helpful last weekend and do some lawn care. AWash refers to this as "man's work" a term that I find a bit on the obnoxious side. But he might be on to something. I managed to trim two of our hedges without a problem, but somehow during the third hedge trimming, I was able to get the power cord around the vibrating blade and cut almost clean through it. While the extension cord didn't not survive this impromtu surgery, I came through with flying colors and not an ounce of electrical shock. But maybe there's something to my brother's mantra about power tools not being for girls.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Scammers
The Next scammer is particularly bad because it is an awkward situation. Thanks to JW, I am a football fan and probably have more knowledge than your typical lady. In fact several people at my old job would underestimate my knowledge only to have to eat their words after a sunday game. hehehehe. anywho, i digress. I've played in a fantasty football league with work related people for a few years....according to Yahoo i'm practically a pro. This year, the fee was $20 a person with half of the winnings going to the regular season winner and half going to the league winner. $100 apiece. I lost the season by a half game but kicked some serious bootay to win the league title. Again where is my payment? Worse yet, this perpetrator happens to be the brother of a very good friend of mine who does not wish to intervene on my behalf because he is not his brother's keeper. Both of these people have gotten emails from me and reminders on my address for where they can send their money. Alas to no avail. Much harder to pursue these scammers since they are in the DC area and I'm back in Nay Nay. Lucky for me, I happen to have a very important event to attend to in Bmore in a few weeks which is in the neighborhood of these scammers, so maybe i'll come back from the wedding with a heavier pocket.
And one last scammer to that comes to mind is everyone's favorite convenient store Cee Vee Ess. They have their own card that they scan in order to track your purchases and, ideally, provide coupons on your favorite products. But if you look at these coupons they have a short valid time. If you just bought a large bottle of conditioner what are the odds you'll need to replensih within three to four weeks? Same with pain medicine. If I just bought a bottle of Advil why do I need a coupon for pain medicine that only lasts til the end of the month? I mean if you're going through a bottle of Aspirin/Advil/Tylenol/Aleve within that short period of time you may just want to consult your doctor about what's buggin you....cause that ain't healthy.
Monday, June 12, 2006
The Capital Life
If you think about DC is probably a cool place for me to be. I still have a bunch of friends in the area from the GW days. My pseudo big brother jk and his soon to be wife angie are minutes away in bmore as well as nay nay's finest in kelmic, throw in the fact that ms. kimmy will be moving down shortly and the fact that biggest bro has a tendency to frequent the city on "business" and you've got all the makings of a perfect locale. Close enough that i can visit home whenever i so choose, yet far enough away that I can feel as though i'm living on my own. Cause that's what MA is coming down to, in addition to the employment issues, i'm starting to wonder if its possible for me to be truly independent being in such close proximity to the parentals. I felt like an adult in DC on my own, with my own apartment and my own bills but in MA I seem to be more dependent and "youngest" mentality. Don't like it, don't really know how to get out of it. I know its doable cause i got plenty of friends who stayed in MA and are on their own, but I'm not sure that they come from as close-knit of a family as mine. Surely, people that know me and the jw would not on the surface believe we are close because we have a tendency to push each other's buttons. But you can only really be annoyed by those you love, right? Otherwise you wouldn't care what the other person did.
Of course, while I'm applying to jobs in DC, I've also come up with a brilliant plan to hire on with a doggy day care place, cause that could be a fun interim position, what's better than playing with puppies all day? That or a postal position, but i fear for my own sanity and safety in the postal world.
Thirteen days til the beginning of the Summer of Wedding Festivities begins, and the 49 cent dress is back from the tailor's and ready to be worn...
