Dear Mr. Jackass

Dear LP P999,

You may think that since you have one of those fancy short license plates and a black jeep that you are above the law. Well my friend, you are indeed an ass and the worst kind of ass. You are that special breed that goes above and beyond being rude and flitters into that lovely category of ass that may cause bodily harm to others with your rudeness. Who I am? Ah yes, I am the car that had the audacity to stop at the red light and to look to make sure there were no oncoming cars before proceeding with my right turn. Who are you? You are the gigantic ass who was behind me and apparently never learned the red means stop and even when you are going right on red that you must stop first because you don't have the right of way. Now maybe because you have your big badass Jeep you don't really worry about colliding with other cars because you're all fancy and off roading. However, anytime you're driving in the mall area you had best be prepared to get stuck at least 3 times on red lights. Not only did you rudely lay on the horn to alert me to your displeasure with me obeying a red light, but then you decided that you were more important than me and chose to illegally pass me on the left by getting into the oncoming traffic lane. Mr. Jackass you are lucky my mother was in the car with me. If I was alone, or even with my father, I would've kept pace with you to prevent you from cutting me off. Since my mom is "New York" in all senses except driving I allowed you to commit your rude (and illegal move) with nothing more than my horn escorting you all the way to the Pike. Too bad one of the Logan Express buses wasn't on its way back at the right moment are you could've seen what continued rudeness will get you.

Sincerely,

Ms. I know that Red means stop