Bad Guys: 3 Good Guys: 2

This has been a rough week for the good guys

First blow? Wes the ass from Austin won the male Duel. This is awful for a variety of reasons. Most of all cause he's a cocky ass and somehow managed to con his way to the final. Makes me upset to see him win over Brad who while he has his moments isn't mean for the sake of being mean. I'm not sure why Wes thinks he's all that and a bag of chips but now that he's won a Challenge I'm sure he's about to become more unbearable on tv. Note to MTV, leave him off challenges, he's just an ass not the kind that are fun to watch on tv, I don't love hating him, I just hate him.

Second? Marcel made it to the finals of Top Chef. I tend to think that this is one of those passes that the producers of the show gave to keep it interesting. You know how they always have these disclaimers on reality tv that producers get to contribute to the outcome of the show. Well, dude is definitely not as a talented as the other chefs. Furthermore, the previous season they emphasized that attitude and demeanor in the kitchen was part and parcel of being a "Top Chef" and now they say they don't care that he tries to ruin other people's dishes. I don't even care who wins now.

Third? Uggggh, evil Peyton Manning staged an amazing comeback and ruined my season. I mean I applaud them for coming from behind by 18 to win one, but still the bad guys won. Well, not even bad guys just bad guy. I have no beef with Tony Dungy or Reggie Wayne or even Marvin Harrison. It's just manning that pisses me off. Blech. I suppose I could've expected nothing else since the Pats were ravaged by the Boston flu bug right before the game. At least they made it interesting and didn't just completely give up.

Good stuff?
1)Jodi beat the evil Russian Svets on the Duel. I liked Svets, and I really wanted to like her but like I've mentioned she started copping this tude with other people that was unwarranted and perhaps showed her real colors. Yeah for Road Rules Jodi for winning one of these

2) Awww G-Dub! Awwww G-Dub! After being disappointed to discover that the Buff and Blue are officially the Number one school in the country for expense it was awesome to see Dokun and the colonials on Saturday beat the Rhodies! Especially since the boys I know were a big part of the reason why they won. It was a nail biter and me and big papa took the adventure down to URI and it was well worth it.

That's about it for me. I have recently realized that my references have screwed me over and I shall not be able to apply for the fellowship I had been planning on applying for. Veddy Sad, but perhaps just as well cause I think they are looking for a minority to be their fellow.

Kibbitz Korner

Some thoughts of mine from the last few days. I've been wicked sick so I've had some time to contemplate a wide range of topics:

1) PATS going to the AFC championship game again. Werd!!! All you haters out there can kiss it. It might have been ugly and there is a good argument that the better team did not win on Sunday, but guess what??? The team with the most heart did win. The Pats didn't give up....EVER. Look at Troy, look at Hobbs, look at Brady having arguably one of his worst games and turning it into one for the memories. The Bolts had tons of chances to put it away and they choked, plain and simple. Now LT is being a big ass baby and complaining about the lack of class of the Patriots. Excuse me LT! I get that you're upset cause you're the MVP and your team put on quiet a show for the year even though your QB could use some more seasoning but methinks you have no place to comment on class. None of the Pats got arrested during the season. That is setting a good example to the kids, unlike your teammates. The Pats never prevented fans of the opposing team from attending a game, unlike your team. The Pats never planned a Super Bowl parade BEFORE they even got to the Big Game, unlike your team. (ummm has anyone out there even heard of Karma? Paging Mama McNabb) And last but not least....and this applies to several teams....perhaps y'all will think twice before you start talking smack in the media about the opposition. Take a note. All the Pats do every week is talk about what a tough game they face...even when it is a huge stretch to take the opposition seriously. All the Bolts did was talk trash about the Patriots. LT, before you start talking about a classless coach and team maybe you should start keeping your own peeps in check.

2)The Real World/Road Rules Duel is my guilty tv pleasure. Well, to be honest there are several lower quality shows that make their appearance on my tv screen, but this is the one I'm embarrassed about. I've got to say it. Wes is a grade A assh&*e. He sucks, he's a mean bastard who is borderline abusive to his girlfriend and has less than zero respect for woman. Check that, dude has no respect for anyone that is not him. He mocked a guy for not making it onto a Real World cast, but let's establish something. By making one challege, Kenny is now equally as famous as Wes. Even better, Kenny is famous for being funny and athletic and Wes is famous for being a horny bastard that made a groupie drawer and verbally abused his partner. Why the hate? Because somehow this guy has made the finals of both challenges he has been on because he's too good at being manipulative, and it pisses me off. The world would be far better off if they entire Austin cast (except for that military nurse, she was semi normal) just disappeared. Hope San Diego Brad wins it all. By the same token, I hope Svets gets hit in the head. I felt bad for the girl in Key West cause I thought everyone was just mean to her. But what a Biotch. She betrayed her only friend on the season by saying that she'd let her pick the last duel and then going with the one she wanted to do instead. I hope and I feel good that Jodi will pull out the win.

3) 24 is baaaaaaaaaaaaack and Jack Bauer is an animal. I'm not so squeamish with violence but man oh man did 24 make quiet the impression in the season opener. I'm personally blessed with the fangs so at least I have a feasible option if I ever get abducted by terrorists for escaping. Just bite the carotid artery and spit it out on the ground. Word!

4)Why was Beyonce nominated for Best Actress Golden Globe? I've seen DreamGirls and there is really no way to say that Deena was the lead female. I would say that Effie was more of a lead character myself. Nor was Beyonce all that great in the movie. don't get me wrong, she was good and I think it was more the character that I didn't like but no way should she be nominated as a Lead Actress.

5)This dude dressed as Apollo Creed just showed up to audition for American Idol. Yes people American Idol is back. Sweet!!!

When it rains.....

I'm thinking it might be time to give up my blonde ambitions. Clearly, the lightened hair color has affected the way people perceive me. Hate to break it to all you haters, but guess what? I'm not a dumbass. SHOCKING!!! The other day a gentleman at the place I currently temp at felt it necessary to point out to me where a postmark is on an envelope. Are you serious? Not to toot my own horn, but most likely I've accrued more educational information in my pinkie than a significant portion of the people who treat me like a bimbo. It's not like i was twirling my hair on my finger or sticking my hip out and emitting a high pitch tone in my voice. Nope, apparently I just look like I require help in putting two coherent words together. Piiishaww.

In other fun temping news, I was berated not once but twice but a gentleman while I was working the switchboard today. Dude took issue with company policy about not transferring to a specific person without a contact name. "Dude, it's not my policy I just have to do what I'm told". He starts blabbing on about some technological doo hickey and that he needs help. I key in on the word "HELP" and transferred him to the help hotline. Not 10 seconds later, dude calls back and starts yelling at me that i'm not listening to him and i'm not being helpful and that he wants my name. I happily give it to him, (fully knowing that he, like everyone else will probably refer to me as Karen or Sharon or anything except my actual name), and then try to listen to him again. Came thisclose to letting him know my feelings about his phone manners, but instead apologized that he felt that the policy was not helping him. Then he starts bringing up the doo hickey again, so I offer to send him to a sales hotline. Thankfully this either appeased him or he gave up...either way I was satisfied with him being gone.

Exciting news: Two job offers AND an interview that had nothing to do with the offers....AND a call from a place I applied to.....yesterday. Now that's the kind of response I've been waiting for.

Laslty, my San Fran trip has been delayed a bit. Yan, it's not that I don't want to come out for el bebe or that I can't financially. But by spreading out the Washkowi travel plans you get more assistance over a greater period of time. Plus old man Sam really shouldn't be in a kennel for long anymore. Takes him way to long to work out his old man bones after that. I'll be out sooner rather than later. :) No worries, you know how I like to hold my babies

Beyonce saves the day

Great googilee moogilee do I have great timing. Brother AWash has been bugging me about how I seem to be working during his days off. Apparently me actually being employed crimps his style a bit, so being the good sister I am I requested an additional day off last week. And boy oh boy what a good thing it is that they like me there. StayWash's car is "undrivable" in the words of a frustrated mechanic. Unfortunately somebody driving Awash's car drove over a nail thus putting his car out of commission on Thursday too. He calls me as he is pulling into the tire place to request a pick up in exchange for breakfast. I hop in the shower and go get him. Off to bfast and then I take him to Norwood to help reform up the A-OK moving service. However, Mr. A Wash doesn't like listening to directions all the way through and we came to a T Bone intersection. "Left or right?", I ask. Cue Beyonce's "irreplacable"..... AWash says, "well if B says 'To the left, to the left', I guess we should go left". And she knew of what she spoke. We arrived in Norwood to move some of Chris' stuff into a truck. I was not super helpful as she lived on the third floor and after a few trips the good ole bionic knee started wobbling. So i helped to clean up cat hair. then it was back to the dirty nat to pick up AWash's car and a trip out to medway. Upon arrival, Awash finally decides to ask if I have issues with highway driving, after leading me down the pike and 495.....for the record I do not have highway issues but i don't really like having to follow people on the highway. Back in medway to finally see the new abode and somewhat assist in unpacking. Get fed with pizza and cookies and I'm on my way. Luckily, the two cats did not cause any issues this time. Back on the highway to go home. Very eventful day off, too bad I didn't get to make the two calls I needed to make. Ah well.

UPDATE: Scheduling a phone interview with a local company and have secured my third letter of recommendation for DC fellowship

It's hard out here for a temp....

Long time no write. Sheesh have i had some computer issues over the last few weeks. That coupled with a new temping assignment where I (gasp) did not have access to the internet means that I haven't written for quite some time.

First things first, some shout outs:

-Many thanks to all Washes big and small for making a lovely (and lucrative) Hanukkah season. Big papa came through HUGE and provided me with a new laptop that shall not crimp my style like the old school Sony I had been sporting
-A thanks to M.Karp for a nice message thanking me for pics, very nice to hear people appreciating my work
-Many apologies to YaWash, I know you're supposed to be relaxin and how can you do so without some quality reading material? I'm baacccck so no worries no more

Still haven't heard from the folks at "Hazelnut High" about my compensation. I proposed them purchasing the texts from each course that they discarded my notes.....I don't think they're down with that since it's gonna reach about $200 but it'd be nice if they responded.
Secured 2/3 of the recommendations that I need for a fellowship that I am applying for. I don't have a good feeling about this one because I think they are hoping to hire a minority but seeing as disqualifying on account of my race would be "illegal" I'm trying to keep positive. Haven't heard from the human capital analyst that I applied to which I tend to think means that I'm not being considered but it is an awkward time of year for hiring so who knows?
My latest assignment as taken me to Wellesley Hills where I've been entering serial numbers for the new Charlie Cards (cause Boston has finally joined the rest of the country in establishing a card system for mass transit). There are three other temps. Let's just say that only of them made work more bearable. Cool chick who is getting married so we chatted about all things wedding (still in the mode). Lucky for us we even got put in our own area, but I think we irritated people with our chatting cause a lot of doors tended to close around us. Sadly she had other jobs so she wasn't always around. As for the other two? Well, one is in her early thirties and has two kids. A psychologist may say this would cause some stunted maturity since she was taking care of her kid during her youth. This may account for some of her less desirable work ethic traits. This girl got all kinds of praise that first day she was around cause she could type fast, but she didn't think to keep the cards in order (which FYI is the second most important aspect of the task), then she would come and go as she pleased. Then she thought it would be fun to roam around our boss's personal computer...NOT COOL. Plus, this chick would keep telling stories that make me wonder if she is aware that she is no longer 22. She has actually used duct tape to bind her "tummy" in while she went clubbing. YOWZA. And the topper? She asked me how my Christmas was. I told her that I was of the Tribal religion which didn't seem to register with her because she didn't know that us "Tribal Folk" do not celebrate the birth of Christ. What person over the age of 6 doesn't realize that not everyone celebrates Christmas? I mean really in this PC age. Then there's the boy. He's still a teenager, thinks it cool to show up to work in a hoodie and eat all of the office's food. More importantly, he thinks that when he's sick or otherwise unable to come to work that it is acceptable to call me and have me talk to our boss. Um, no! Dude lives down the street from me which means i've been driving him to and from work with a promise of gas payment. Too bad he got canned before giving me this gas card. I say good riddance though cause he made everything he was involved in waaaaaaaaaaaay too complicated....
I think that does a good job of bringing everyone up to date. Now that i'm all fancy and wireless I promise to do better with the updating.

Adios for now.

Hazlenut High School

So in the words of Meredith Grey I was trying to be bright and shiny Taryn. Thought I'd try out the whole bright attitude mantra to see if good things would soon come my way because of my outstanding karma. But peeps keep getting in my way and ruining bright shiny Taryn.

Example 1: My last temping gig was at "Hazelnut High", a local artsy fartsy (or "performing arts" private school). My duty was data entry which is muy boring but whatever, such is the life of a temp. Problemo #1, once again I must deal with the immediate assumption that since I am a temp I must be a bimbo. Naturally, the blonde hair doesn't help this case and I must smile nicely while realizing that I most likely have more education under my belt than any of them will aspire to (that's what it is good to be a master, you shall see JK)....Problemo #2, the desk I am assigned is not designed very well and in the first day I lose sensation in my wrists and develop a nagging crick whenever i move them. I ask for a notebook to prop the keyboard on and in response I am given a floppy covered one. Guess how much support this gives. So the next day and for the remainder of my time I bring in my own personal hardcover notebook that I had in grad school and which contained a culmination of notes from my favorite/most interesting courses. Great! Stupendous! I make fabu progress on their boring project. Then the dude whose desk I was using asked if I would mind moving to a laptop since it was his last couple of days and he needed to straighten it. Sweet, laptops rock! So I move onto a dell laptop in my own private office. My last day was on Friday and I hear them crack open an alcoholic beverage or two to celebrate the dude and also make fun of students (seemingly a favorite pasttime of people in education) while I work. Five pm arrives and I gather my stuff and return to the first office to get my notebook. As it was hidden amongst other things I decide to open it. All I see are blank pages. "Did you throw out my notes??" I ask in as nice a voice as I can manage. OH yeah, they threw out my notes because they asked "everyone" in the office if they knew to whom the notes belonged. I'm no full fledged investigator but let's just think of who could notes about crime, forensics, and child abuse belong to in a performing arts school????? Could it be the temp who has mentioned her MA in Criminal Justice. Fantastic these SOBs threw out my personal property AND didn't even pay me well

Example #2, I braved the mall again and was forced by mommy dearest to try on a skirt that I had no interest in. Dumb ass woman decides to ignore the look under the door rule of dressing room conduct. Also ignores the knock before entering rule. What rule does she observe? The open the door and look check. Say wha?! No thanks sister friend, people gotta pay for that kinda show. So I oh so nicely shove the door right back in her face to which she utters, "er uh sorry" in a meek and newly nasal voice.

Example #3, also occurs in the mall. I was looking at a cart in the middle section of the mall when all of a sudden my surgically repaired knee caves in. This no longer happens without provocation and what do i see? A rude woman who clipped me with her mall provided stroller rocket. Do I get a sorry? Hell no! So my response is to say in a somewhat loud voice, "hey no worries, it didn't hurt that you just slammed into me and kept walking. " She's lucky I didn't go New York on her cause my tolerance level was reaching its limit. If not for the nice gift wrap ladies who gave me some store coupons when i first got to the mall I'm thinking I would've had to bust out my ninja moves.

So I'm trying to be bright and shiny but someone is gonna have to keep all of these yahoos away from me.

Turducken for everyone

Yum Yum, I do so love the holidays. Here's a much delayed round up of holiday events and personal observations.

-Wednesday night, I sit very confused in my house, aware that there is something that I traditionally do but cannot remember. So what do I do? I hop in the shower. And good thing too! When I get out I have a message from Jen asking me when I'm getting to the local Irish pub for fun and festivities. Ah ha! I think to myself, that is what I do. I did not realize how much I depend on the JW to remind of my drinking duties. I gussied up and went over to join Mr and Mrs. Mo, Plan B and JK. JK most definitely took up the drinking void that was left by the absence of Wash and YaWash.

-I find it amusing when Natick folk don't recognize each other (see AWash completely drawing a blank when our neighbor of forever and a day tried to speak to him last year). This year the Capt Oblivious Award goes to Plan B. I come back from one of many trips to the Powder Room (three toilets don't swing it for reunion night), I come back and JK has gone missing. I ask Plan B where he is and he starts laughing that JK has been hitting on some girl at the bar. I take a peek and it is none other than Lizzy K. Who is the daughter of momma K's friend. Strictly Platonico. Fear not Angie, you could totally take her.

-Next Day is turkey day. Another day where JW was missed. Why? Cause in addition to my baking duties I was forced into manual labor that is usually covered by his Washness. Then there was the whole missing my fam bit. We were down a few this time, only 16 and all of the missing parties were misseed. It made for one of the most sparsely filled "Kid Picture" to date (see bottom)

-my apple pie was DEVOURED so quickly that papa Dub almost didn't get any and we know that wouldn't have ended well, so next year I must make 3 pies this way AWash gets a pie the way he likes it and won't pout while he eats.

-I braved the shopping malls on Black Friday and honestly I don't get what the big deal is. Sure I practiced my karate chop and the trusty bait and switch moves that have worked so well in the past. I even did some practice "underfire" parking on my street before I embarked. But what a waste! I had zilch difficulty in parking at CC, minimal issues at BB and absolutely not problemo getting a primo spot at the Mall at noon (course there was that tricky matter of defensively driving the wrong way down a one way lane of the parking garage, but in my defense who has ever heard of direction specificity in a parking garage?) Anywho, it was a vaguely successfuly venture, I got one sister in law taken care of, a preliminary gift for anonymous nephew, and a couple of things for the brothers wash.

-Most ironic sight of the week thus far. A giant Land Rover on SUPER SUPED up tires covered in bumper stickers that one would think would belong on say....oh i don't know a Prius. Silly environ freak driving a gas guzzling SUV, gotta love it

Why Seattle is not the place for me....

One week of rain results in high humidity levels. This week of rain happens to be corresponding to a particular week of the month during which I suffer from increased bitchiness and susceptibility to pain. Awesome. Do we see where I am going with this? I am in and have been in severe pain for the last few days. Part of the problem of having a twice surgically repaired knee and one in which the inside was deteriorating to the point for my doctor to refer to it as the knee of a senior citizen and not the young person that I am.

So I'm feeling bitchy and moany and all kinds of not nice. What could help this situation? A friendly question of "are you okay?". What does not help? Getting a phone call and being accused of being a grumpy pants and then assorted other ribbing which while good natured, feeds my anger and nearly resulted in a quick hang up of the telephone. Lucky for me or Mr. Anonymous, Samson's bowels came into play and I was given a legitimate reason for my quick departure off the phone.

-You know what else bugs me? Annoying telemarketers. I have a heart, I get the purpose for charities, but gimme a break. Being harassed by the organization makes me LESS not MORE likely to donate to your cause. When I'm prepared to make donations, I will do it and those places that call repeatedly will fall to the bottom of the list. Then there is the retail worker whom I encountered today. 1) it is not my fault that your store is not doing a good job of keeping their supplies in a fashion that makes sense and is easy to locate different sizes and styles. Yes, I was probably bitchy in my remarks, but guess what? You work in retail and that is part of the job description to handle angry patrons in a professional manner. Bitch to all your friends when I've left the store but it is your job to make me feel as though my complaints are legit and not that I'm annoying you by asking about shipments.

-The Wal-Mart greeter is a good idea in theory....I guess. Today there was a very elderly gentleman assigned this task. Now, I don't like to be rude and if they acknowledge me, I greet them right back, cause lets face it...that job sucks. Today, I walked towards him...nothing, as I am passed him, he shouts "HI HOW ARE YOU TODAY", i was so shocked by this sudden display of life that I jumped and was unable to verbalize a response. Made me feel guilty, but then again given the volume at which he spoke, it is entirely possible that he would never have heard my response anyway.

-I was glad when the early 90's fed into the mid 90's for a variety of reasons, but one of them was that there would be no more hammer pants. Both brothers Wash, were guilty of this trend. I tried to get a picture for this but I cannot at this time. The point is that Emmitt managed to pull off his best Hammer imitation like a true MVP last night. Absolutely fraktastic! Mario wasn't bad either though I couldn't figure out what Tiffani Amber Thiessen was doing in the audience til I remembered the SBTB connection early this am. Should be interesting to see who is crowned champ.

-Vinny Testaverde? Really? I mean seriously Billy Boy, is there something that Patriots Nation should be aware of? Further evidence of the Leave the Pats Curse, David Givens aka Mr. Greedy Pants the first, left for the Titans and was immediately plagued by injury. Guess what? He's done for the rest of the season having played for a cumulative 2 games max. Add that to the injuries that plague Ty Law and other greedy desserters and it means that Deion "delicate" Branch is only a matter of quarters away from suffering another injury. Ah well

- poor sucker in fantasy football. My team is decidedly pathetic in all respects. I attribute most of this to the bogus scoring system but I've already discussed that. At least I can bring other folks down. I have 2 wins (including against the current Board Leader) and this week my opponent only managed a tie against my sad sack of a team. hehehe

I think that's enough bitching and moaning for the day, you dont like it? Nobody told you to read it all the way through.

Sabbatical

Peace out people, I'm taking a Sabbatical from Blog World. I don't even know why people are getting mad at me, since I had nothing to do with the "showdown" on another blog. Right now, I have too many thoughts in my brain that are inappropriate to be sharing with y'all. So I'm peacing out for a bit til the kitchen cools down. Maybe I'll come back in a week or maybe not until the new year.

Yowza

Good Grief! All kinds of havoc was wreaked on my poor sister in law's blog. She wrote a post about her political views and then got in a heated argument with my bro. Funny part was, she didn't know whom she was insulting. (okay not funny in that traditional ha ha sense). The part I found the most amusing is the conviction that sis in law and JW had that Mr. Anonymous could not possibly be the infamous AWash. Silly folks have clearly been on the west coast too long if they couldn't fathom the response that referring to him as an "ignorant idiot" would have. This sibling does not, never has, and never will take kindly to being insulted in any form.

In other news, BJ's sucks. They strung me a long for a week, fully knowing that they did not intend to hire me. Worse, they strung my agency along for the week as well, which may cause some strained relations in the future cause people generally don't like being screwed around with. With the permission of one of my GW pals, I applied to some jobs at this marketing place down in the District using her as a reference. Haven't heard back yet, but perhaps I'll send a lil note to confirm receipt of the original app.

Poor Sammy Wammy today. Had an accident during a ride (not his fault) and in an effort to not sit in his mess, wound up stuck between the front and back seats again. This required a lot of agility on my part to get him out, clean the car, and prevent injury....all in the rain. A yucky way to begin the day. Then came the realization that I am screwed when it comes to this holiday season. I am simply flat out of ideas and I have a reputation for gift giving to live up to. I gave AWash and StayWash presents on 3 or 4 separate occasions. COmpletely my pleasure, but good Lord I got nothing when it comes to holiday gift ideas for either of them. Papa W is one of the toughest folks on the planet to shop for and my mom's birthday is perilously close to the holidays this year and I only have one gift idea thus far. I even went to the mall today to see if I was inspired with gift ideas....maybe it was too early to see anything worthwhile, they usually hold out the good stuff until after turkey day anyway.

One last note, young men who work for Victoria's Secret are CREEPY, and all of the folks who work for the kiosks in the mall are beyond ANNOYING. I get it, its their job to sell stuff, but when you see flocks of people walking out of there way just to avoid you, perhaps it is time to change your tactics and let people come to you. I already have a cell phone and I'm in a contract, so NO i don't want to talk to you T Mobile people, get over it. And Mr. Magic Nail man, I have no nails and if I had the slightest interest in your product I would slow down and look over your cart, not try to avert eye contact with you. Luckily, I sported to the twin braid Pochahantas look, thus making me appear approximately 15 years old and not a worthy bracket for pursuit today. Finally, something going my way!

It ain't easy being Sammy

So my pobre perro has been suffering from some maladies as of late. Seeing as he's 10.5 years old and really had no health related problems until last summer I can't really complain. But man oh man does it suck to get old. First, puppy has been on a lovely cocktail of vitamins (for joints and shiny coats), thyroid meds, and arthritis medication. When he came back from the kennel for A and StayWash's wedding, puppy starting sneezing quite frequently. I thought perhaps my room had gotten a lil dusty. Until the day when he sneezed and blood came out. No good. Immediately make an appointment with his doc. Go in the next day where we encounter his old doctor that I chose to switch from. Good call on my part because something has clearly gone down between those two. I've never seen my big mean animal so apprehensive and scared with his ears down and in a crouched angry kitty position. So much so that old doc backed off real quick. Compare this reaction to new doc: Wagging tail and immediate approaching to be pat on the head. Anywho once again this doc drops the C-bomb, perhaps there is a cancer in his nose causing his nose to deteriorate. I disagree, but I don't have a DVM or MD after my name so we agree to test out some antibiotics to see if that cures up the issue. Naturally, Sammy requires the antibiotic that goes for about $2.20 a pill and because he's so large he needs 5 a day. Add it up. Toss in some additional pain killers to help him with his arthritis and you have 17 pills daily for our geriatric puppy. However, all seems to be healing so i guess it was worth it.

To add insult to injury, I took him on a car ride on sunday. Why? Because he was stalking me around the house for his weekend drive and my mom said to take him for a quick ride and then we'd hit the mall. We like to go before all those church goers get out of services, makes parking easy. Well, as i made a left turn, samson was standing and barking out of the passenger side window. Deadly combo. Yep, he fell and got wedged between the front and back seats. Neither bone, nor cheese, nor the belief that AWash (which did get him looking around excitedly) could motivate him to rise. My efforts to boost his bottom with my cold crutch were futile. Then DING DING DING, I am smacked with inspiration. Hand off the leash to my moms and go to our friendly next door neighbors who own a mini pinscher named Nico. I ask for a weird favor and then ask to borrow Nico for motivation. "might as well be useful to somebody" I am told. I get the littlest dog with the biggest complex in the world on a leash. i haven't even passed the fence when I can see my car moving back and forth as samson is trying to meet his enemy. He makes a valiant attempt but cannot get out the way we wanted. so i bring Nico around to the otherside at which point samson very eagerly escapes the confines of the car and in a great jump madly approaches Nico. Mission Accomplished!!!!

- Did my duty and voted on Tuesday...my guy won. I say "my guy" but once again it seems as though the election was choosing between the lesser of two evils. Kinda sad when you think about it, but then again I suppose its near impossible to agree with a candidate on every issue. Especially for someone like me who finds themselves leaning on the conservative edge when it comes to criminal justice related issues and liberal when it comes to everything else.

- I've got a beef with two corporations. One of them is screwing my parents out of a new dishwasher. They have a service plan that says after 4 visits POOF new machine. Well after the 7 visit in the last few months, they claim no no no, we want to try and replace all of the mechanisms inside first and if that doesn't work then you get a new machine. Seem more fiscally responsible on both ends if we just got a machine. The policy means we're not paying for these parts, but I can't imagine that essentially replacing all of the parts is more cost effective than just giving a new machine. Losers! Second beef? A certain wholesaler seems to be jerking me around. I had a choice between this wholesaler and Mt. Ida during the summer and chose Mt. Ida at the time. Given the choice again, I'd choose Mt. Ida over and over. Well this wholesaler had an opportunity on a temporary basis so I decided to give it a shot. Met with them on Monday and as today is Thursday I still have not heard from them. Seeing as the last time I interviewed I heard the same day I have an inkling that pay back might be the name of the game.

-just sent my resume and a reference within the company to this place in DC, so perhaps I'll have to consider moving once again.

-some more revelations from the wedding. It was brought to my attention that my eldest brother AWash believes that I need a man to "take care of me". The anonymous source said that at one point he was being considered as a suitable match for me but now that he is taken, my brother might be turning his sights on another friend. Very cute that he thinks I need to be taken care of, but a little sad that he doesn't think I'd be able to find someone suitable on my own. Though given my track record, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.

-Working in the Development office at the Ida influenced my decision to donate to GW this year for the first time ever. What do i get? An extrememly non personal printed receipt for my records, not the slightly less inpersonal acknowledgement letter that the Mustangs send out. Stupid over priced hoity toity school.

-New favorite store opening: Petsmart (I'm sure this will wear off as Loew's and the new mall stores will be opening throughout the year). But where else can you get pet supplies, a kennel/daycare, full service grooming, and vet clinic in one place???? Totally Rad

-Ride Emmit Ride! I'm pumped that Emmit Smith made it to the finals! Who would've thunk that a running back would be more graceful than a wide receiver (love you Jerry Rice, but Emmit blows you away)

TDawg's Back...Alright!!!

So sorry folks. First, my computer went kaput and said no more internet. Then I return from my time off to attend to wedding things and I find out that my assignment at Mt. Ida would come to an end last Friday. And I had to train a very nice British woman which meant I lost computer rights altogether starting on last Wednesday. Blech. So much to catch y'all up on.

First some observations. I gotta say it. I love my dog but there are limits to what it is appropriate when it comes to having him tag along. I take him on errands but he stays in the car...where he belongs. He does not walk around a grocery store with me or stroll along the mall. Imagine my shock today when I was driving by a local cemetary and saw a couple walking a dog through the graveyard! Say wha?! I mean really how rude is that? Letting your dog piss and poo on somebody's grave? DEEE-sgusting.

Now on to more pleasant things. As written on the Wash's blog a week ago, mi hermano mayor got married to a very pretty lady last week. So I shall recount for my highlights and lowlights.

First the highlights.
-having the wash and family in town is always a fun time. Seeing YaWash all pregnant was nice too because I didn't really get to hang with her when she was carrying Jude in her belly
-Cold Stone Creamery visit with JW, Yan, Jude, and papa w was DElish. I highly recommend a visit there if you have the time.....even if it is chilly
-couldn't beat the weather
-Rehearsal dinner:
good eats (staywash has most excellent taste in all things wedding related) [note the ginormous cookie in hand]

-the speeches were topnotch. Awash's dentist friend gave a hilarious speech (too bad it was basically the speach that JW planned on giving the following night). My good friend TMosk gave the only speech that brought a tear to my eye. The fact that I was in it? Merely coincidence.
-Jude's new favorite game is chase me/chase Auntie Taryn. I give myself props for being able to maintain this game at a high velocity for over an hour, sans knee brace
-the hotel for the affair was redonculous. Check out one of the views for my hotel room. Yes that is me in the back, I feel it adds an artsy flair.
-after the rehearsal dinner, me and mis hermanos with one of Awash's old buddies, hit the hotel bar for some libations. As always, we Washkowi know how to have a good time. However, one of us still has not learned his limits. Said middle child, wound up booting all over the place in his room. Something that I had the pleasure of discovering when I awoke the next day. I opened my door and found a bunch of sheets in front of my door. The housekeeper was kind enough to open up the sheets and show me the contents of Middle Child's stomach from the night before. Tre appetizing! The picture to the right is an attempt to soak up any remaining alcoholic content in the belly.

-got to see Adam and Jen again. Definitely amongst my favorite folks. Didn't get to hang as much as I would like but I know I'll get to see them for turkey soon.
-StayWash was absolutely stunning in her dress. She truly was the perfect bride.
-Awash looked good too, and he didn't make me bend in pictures with him!
-Top notch food

-the open bar was a fantastic idea! I enjoyed it thoroughly. (note my nephew to the right, we start young in my family)
-good times with the family, good dancing, good to see old friends I haven't seen in awhile and AWash's friends are fantastic fun folks

Lowlights:
-the vomit was nasty
-running for 1 hour sans brace was not wise.
-twisting the ankle not fun
-having to say goodbye to JW, Jude, and Yan
***UPDATED - I forgot to put the absensce of Jon and Angie here before. Because really, those two definitely add flair to events that they attend. Sadly they fell victim to the year of a bazillion weddings
-not writing about this earlier, because some of my memories have managed to fade already. End result? I know I had a wicked pissa time and I'm happy to have a new sister in law because she makes my brother veddy happy.

So for all of you that missed me, here's my diddy to signify that I'm back. Guess who's back? Back again? TDawg's back...tell a friend!

Hold Your Horses

All righty people, I know that y'all know I was at a very important function this weekend. However, my wrap up and commentary on said event shall have to wait a wee bit longer because I can not do this post justice without my ability to post appropriate photos to correspond. As my eldest brother, "AWash" has said on several occasions. My superhero power is the ability to disable electronic equipment. Well my ability is not under control yet and I have to bring the laptop in to the repair shop to see if it can be fixed. if not, then I shall be making quite a large purchase soon which is a bit disturbing since my temping gig at Mt. Ida ends on Friday.

To tide you over until my recap here is another sad excuse for a joke (though I like the fact that I can make the pregnant lady laugh even if it is incredibly cheesey)

Why do they call Newton the Garden City?
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Because there is a Rosenblum (sound it out) on every corner.

hehehehe

Puddin Pop

Now I'm no fancy shmancy lawyer or high falootin corporate honcho but I do have a job that "occupies" my time from 8:30am to 4:30pm on a weekday basis. I quote occupy because I shall describe to you my duties, which may explain my new ability to contribute more regularly to my blog.

7:05 AM - wake up, step over the furry roommate and eat my breakfast in peace as the parentals have their alarm set for the same time but do not make an appearance until between 7:20 and 7:30

7:50AM - I make a valiant attempt to leave. I have to wait until this time because the Dirty Nat has succombed to pressure and has established a billion bus stops in my neighborhood for a school that is within a mile of my abode. So all the lil neighborhood thug wannabees have shown a tendency to gather in front of my house to light fireworks (at night) and play football (before the bus). I cannot leave during this because I would be too tempted to run them over with my car because I know that their uncoordiated little bodies have probably been hitting my car.

8:30-8:40 - this is about the time I roll into work. I shoot for the 8:30 slot because that's technically when I'm supposed to be here (plus its the only time when you can get a good parking spot) but traffic is a biotch so its usually closer to the 40ish end of things. Lucky for me, punctuality is not a gift that people in my office are blessed with. One commutes from Worcester so he's either obscenely early in an attempt to beat the traffic or a tad late.

8:40-noonish - this is when I catch up on emails. Read tv recaps and blogs. Sometimes I head over to the trusty Facebook site to see what my friends are up to. Also a bit of networking going on over there. Basically, I try to look busy so people don't pity me. I hit up about 4 celebrity/entertainment related sites before venturing over to the sports and news categories. Eventually, around 10ish someone comes up with a task for me. So I make three copies of something and get back to my surfing. At 11, the trusty mail man comes so I have another 20 minutes of updating incorrect alumni addresses. If I'm lucky there are some donation checks that take a lil while to process. Today I got to put name badges together! Tres exciting!

Lunch time in the trusty caf. Whenever I go in there, it makes me think of those newsreports about how safe are we from bacteria. It just looks like festering bacteria hole. This week's food selections have been subpar and dangerous. My number one rule? If you can't identify the meat by sight you need to move along. I tried to do a turkey sandwhich cause you can't screw that up right? I was never one of those kids that ate the fake plastic food, but if I did I bet the taste would be similar to what I ate today. They put in a new ice cream station but I let myself get intimidated by football players who made a comment about "puddin' pop" as soon as they saw my booty. I'm not gonna lie, there's some jiggle to my wiggle and I've heard all kinds of references to my derriere but puddin pop made me take pause and I selected a small cookie instead. I'm hoping this is not a violation of the wedding diet.

Post lunch time - this is what I am currently in. I'm B-O-R-E-D, there are some student employees today and they keep me entertained. I looked for some jobs again and reapplied to a job I applied to last year. Mostly because there appears to be a different person in charge of hiring. the head honcho has left early again which means there is less than a 10% chance I'll be given anything to do before I leave. I did receive a check today so I can leave early so that I "have time" to drop it off before the office closes. Word! This time is usually what I reserve for my plan to win gold. AOL's pop culture Gold Rush. Me and my gold buddy Kellay got kinda screwed yesterday with technical difficulties but here's hoping we make it to the ATL this week. Probably not though since the final is on Sat, when neither have has access to a computer

What else do I do? Oh yeah, two of my pops have gotten me involved in football rackets. So as to not confuse them (one involves a spread) I have to research on different days. Today is Big Poppy day so I've been looking at collegiate and NFL games to make my picks. Yesterday I did reserach for JK senior. here's hoping for a victory cause I need some new electronics.

that's about it, I get to learn about proper wound wrapping techniques for samson at 6 because it is suture removal day. the fun never ends in the Dirty nat

Does this not please you?

Yowza, i'm taking hits on the family front all around. First my lovely emotional sister in law dares to suggest that the frequency of my posts can be attributed to a lack of me having a life. Now I dont want to necessarily debate whether I do in fact have a life (money problems can put a damper on that). however, each and every post for the last two months has been done while I have been "working". Cause while Mt. Ida is currently paying the bills it certainly does not keep me busy for the 7-8 hours I am here daily. hence the blogs. A girl's gotta keep busy right?

Then big brother AWash gets on my case for not being funny anymore. Never knew anyone thought I was funny in the first place. Now I feel pressure to keep up my zaniness. To top it off, he pulled a low blow and said for certain that JK is the best blogger amongst the Dirty nat crew. I won't really dispute this either because the Rapist Wit he has displayed keeps me amused as well.

You want funny? Here's a joke: There are two potatoes on the side of the road. how do you tell which one is the prostitute?
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
The one that has Idaho stamped on its skin (sound it out people)

Dear Mr. Jackass

Dear LP P999,

You may think that since you have one of those fancy short license plates and a black jeep that you are above the law. Well my friend, you are indeed an ass and the worst kind of ass. You are that special breed that goes above and beyond being rude and flitters into that lovely category of ass that may cause bodily harm to others with your rudeness. Who I am? Ah yes, I am the car that had the audacity to stop at the red light and to look to make sure there were no oncoming cars before proceeding with my right turn. Who are you? You are the gigantic ass who was behind me and apparently never learned the red means stop and even when you are going right on red that you must stop first because you don't have the right of way. Now maybe because you have your big badass Jeep you don't really worry about colliding with other cars because you're all fancy and off roading. However, anytime you're driving in the mall area you had best be prepared to get stuck at least 3 times on red lights. Not only did you rudely lay on the horn to alert me to your displeasure with me obeying a red light, but then you decided that you were more important than me and chose to illegally pass me on the left by getting into the oncoming traffic lane. Mr. Jackass you are lucky my mother was in the car with me. If I was alone, or even with my father, I would've kept pace with you to prevent you from cutting me off. Since my mom is "New York" in all senses except driving I allowed you to commit your rude (and illegal move) with nothing more than my horn escorting you all the way to the Pike. Too bad one of the Logan Express buses wasn't on its way back at the right moment are you could've seen what continued rudeness will get you.

Sincerely,

Ms. I know that Red means stop

Hoodwinked and Bamboozled

Kellay, you probably should not read this entry or at the very least try not to be offended by it. At the last minute I was asked to join the "Northeast Alliance" fantasy football league by my dear friend. Seeing as a I am a two time defending champion in my past leagues I decided to go for it. Furry Ninjas came back for another round for arse kicking. This was also my first live draft which i have already discussed. BUT, let us discuss the craziness that my friend's friend deems a good scoring system. They have all the traditional scoring categories: TDs, passing yards, receiving yards, rushing yards, sacks, interceptions, field goals, defense...yada yada yada. But what I managed to miss when i was deciding a draft order was this little detail. You get one full point for every completion, reception, and attempt at a run. WHA! This is ludicrous. I played once where you got a 1/4 point for completions and I thought that was a bit strange but I let it go because it made some sense to me to reward the accuracy of the QB. Let's forget about the fact that I had the same QB in two leagues and in the same week he was the second highest scoring in one league while at the bottom of the other. Garbage.

The reason rewarding catches and touches is stupid is because you can have a running back or receiver getting more points for negative yardage than a player who has fewer touches but all positive yardage. how is that right in any fashion? Why should a dude who gets 25 touches and 40 yards get more points than a dude who gets 3 touches, 100 yards and a td? Does that make any kind of sense at all? I think not. Now you may say that I'm a tad on the bitter side because these so called scoring rules have resulted in my team owning a 1-2 record with the fewest points in the league but gimme a break. My example shows the insanity and i stand by it. I should note that my only win came because a fellow Pats fan was extremely disloyal in her team selection. It was karma that beat her. Because the Patriot Gods would never allow a "Pats fan" who picked up Deion "cry baby" Branch and the Cincy defense beat a fellow Pats fan who made Maroney her diamond in the rough pick of the draft and even gave Gosktowski a chance while Vanderjerk was on a bye week.

Ironic moment of the day: (it is barely 11am) my boss who is notorious for his smoking habit has just asked me something smells smokey in the office. Picture my making extreme efforts to keep my face straight during this question. Must think composure!

Vader, is that you?

I followed up my atoning with an interview with a legal type research place located in the District. This was very odd for a few reasons.
1) the interview took place at a fairly random time
2) they had the man with "the voice issues" be on the one to intiate the phone call with me. End result? Me almost blowing my interview at the start by hanging up on the man who I could not understand.
3)The second person on the 4 way conference call interview was a Brittish female. her initial question was on the pronunciation of my name. Sure, that makes sense. I mean it is phoentic but I digress. She followed up her question by mocking my name. Now because she was a cooky Brit I'm not really sure what she said but i heard a mockery of my name and her giggling.
4) Who does a four person conference call for an initial interview?
5) This place is a non profit that seemingly can only exist if they receive funding. So I'm thinking a fair question is whether they have ever lost a grant and what happened. cause I'm not moving down to DC to start a job where if they can't keep up their grant raising I'll get canned in 6 months because they can't afford to keep all of the staff. Homey don't play that!

All in all, i think it went fairly well. They said they'd let me know within a few weeks whether i got the job or not. They might not like the fact that I said I couldn't start until Nov 1, but if you consider the time in finding a place to reside and throw in the familial wedding occurring in two weeks would they rather have me start earlier and make a vacation demand for time off immediately or wait an extra couple of weeks and keep me enslaved for months before i dare ask for time off?

I got involved in a football racket at my dad's office. Apparently my 75% accuracy (damn colts not beating the spread!) impressed some of the dude's at the office. And despite my sister-in-law's opinions on football (i blame the pregnancy hormones for her outrageous commentary) me likey the sport. me likey the fact that I may finally get to use my knowledge (gracias jw) and get some moola. Cause I need a new computer and this temping gig won't be paying for it any time soon, so its time to let the NFL buy me a new laptop!

17 Days and counting

Scrumptiolicious

I must begin by recounting a horrible dream that I had about a week and a half ago. You know the kind that you wake up all panicked unclear about whether you were just dreaming or if something horrible had happened and you were just remembering it? It was of that caliber. I had one of those back in the day when i was a donut girl at a local coffee shop. JW was in town and for some reason I had a dream that there was a wicked bad car crash at the intersection that was visible from the shop. Even worse, JW was part of the crash. The next AM I went to work my shift and not an hour later there was a crash in the same location as my dream. Luckily, JW was not involved as he had been in the dream. Ever since then, i've kinda paid closer attention to my dreams when people I know are involved in them. Well a few weeks ago, I had this dream that AW's pal Kevin was in a motorcycle crash. I had a hard time putting the details together but when I woke up I told AW to inform Kevin that he was banned from riding his bike for a few weeks. Last night I went out with AW, Kevin, his lady friend Chris (first meeting, good peeps) and Kyle. I was to meet up at AW's house with kevin and alex and then we were gonna take a peek at the new house that Kevin and Chris just bought. Imagine my shock and horror as I pull into the driveway and see kevin's bike! WHA! NOOOOOOOOOOOO! Bad, very bad. Even in my dream the bike was definitely his, same color, same helment. I get in the house and I scolded Kevin for tempting fate. Apparently, AW had forgotten to relay the message until he saw kevin on his bike. I tried to piece together more of my dream for him. I vaguely recall being in my house when it happened but I couldn't remember what went wrong. I made sure to follow Kevin when we left and as I saw him brake to slow down on a curve it hit me. HIS BRAKES CUT OUT IN MY DREAM. So I called my big bro and told him to tell Kevin to get those brakes checked out. Hopefully, he listened....otherwise Kevin GET YOUR BRAKES CHECKED OUT

I'd say I'm fairly easy going person. Actually, its kina weird. I'm easygoing when it comes to what other people think are big deals. Oh, you hit me, blech that's cool....oh you say that you ran over my uber expensive items, whatev. You get the point. however, the weirdness ensues because its the little stupid things that get me revved up. When i was in school, i'd get pissed when people borrowed my pencils and didn't return them. Not a huge deal, but i'd get bent all out of shape. The wash can mock and mock and mock me without mercy and I chalk it up to him and his ideas of brotherly love, but he mock shoves me on the stairs and I flip out. Very strange, and I think it may all come down to my huge distaste for rudeness. I HATE rudeness in all levels and I think that's way it gets my goat. this is why i think i may be developing a huge case of road rage. During my commute, I don't mind delays (don't get me wrong I don't like them but they don't really piss me off) but what makes me Hulk like angry is when i get cut off or when some ass doesn't understand stop sign etiquette....like the frakking landscaper today. Its not bad enough that i was approaching the dreaded crossing guard zone but the dumbass landscapers didn't even look towards me before cutting me off, he kept looking (longingly if you ask me) towards the initial crossing guard and went, without noting if it was 1)his turn 2)safe or 3) that wasn't revving up the engine to ram him with my sturdy automobile. Driving in MA you'd think i'd be accustomed to masshole drivers but you'd be wrong. Just a little courtesy. Actually I'll end with a final thought presented by my favorite Rabbi. His sermon was about rudeness and this driver who had some disease meaning that he had a specially rigged vehicle for him to drive with his one functioning arm. Apparently he was also prone to spasms that would force him to drive extremely slowly so as to not cause an accident. Well when this man would drive slowly, people would honk their horns at him and extend certain fingers in his direction and shout things at him as they passed him in the left lane. The sheer amount of anger caught him off guard. One day, he felt a spasm coming on and proceeded to get in the right lane and this time he put on his hazard lights. Hazard lights. No one got angry, no one swore, no one sped by in a huff of frustration. Instead, these little blinking lights signaled to everyone that he was having a problem. he was okay but he was in distress and needed to drive a certain way. By making people aware that he had to drive a certain way, he eliminated the rage of others. Why? Because no one thought he was being "that guy". People are much more forgiving if they dont' feel that they are being disrespected.

Of course this doesn't mean that the landscaping dude deserves any respect. In fact, I think everyone should look at for him and show him the true meaning of masshole drivers.

:)

Happy New Year

To my fellow "tribal" members, a happy new year to you and to all of the goy out there, happy free days off from school. I dig the whole concept of the Jewish New Year. It's actually pretty cool if you think about it. I mean you open a book and forgive those that have wronged you and everyone that you've wronged has to forgive you and ten days later you close the book and poof you are cleansed for the year and get to start all over again. Some may quickly ruin their clean slate while others try to hold out a little longer but its a cool concept. This year was a bit sad, its the last year that I'll get to see the only Rabbi I've ever known. I tried going to services once while I was at school and it just wasn't the same. Reform folk in DC are wacky and there was guitar playing and folk song singing and I felt like perhaps I was in the wrong place or that someone confused the "High Holidays" with a Huge Ho Down.

the other cool thing about the holidays is that we get together with Mo and his fambino. This year was especially fun because Jen's parents and her brother came too. All kinds of education going on about the food for us and what they do on Christmas. Very educational but not in a cheesey or forced way just folks sharing their traditions. Plus, it was fun to watch Ryan try to avoid some of the more potent holiday food items (yeah I'm talking to you Herring, Chopped Liver, Gefiltile Fish and hot pink horseradish). Jewish holiday feasts are not for the faint of stomach. Kellay, you missed another chance to have some soup nuts. My dad thought we should send you some and I told them how you'll probably show up at Seder regardless if I'm around.

Anywho, the only downer to the whole holiday were some of the other attendees at dinner. Last year there was an extremely awkward incident whereby one of these people loudly berated her elderly mother in front of everyone. not only was this embarrassing for her mom but also for all of the other guests in their house. i'm not saying you have to get along with your mom all the time, but there are some conversations that are better had in the privacy of your own home. No one else wants to hear it and it just makes everything after wicked awkward. This elderly mom didn't not attend this year but instead there was knitting before dinner. Kinda rude if you ask me, particularly when the knitter repeatedly asks (rhetorically i presume) "should I stop knitting and being rude"? Course my instinct was to retort "why should this night be different". [for those of you tribal members think of phrasing this retort as one of the four questions at Seder]. Sadly, my good upbringing and lack of desire to create more awkwardness prevented me from forming these words. instead I thought them really hard and hoped that other people would pick up on it. Think my dad did, cause he shares my feelings about this particular woman and he also knew better than to make verbal comments. Ah well, didn't ruin the night. Plus my desserts came out pretty good even though they were new recipes and no one seemed to mind being my guinea pig. Sweet!

Until next time...